Soul-searching Introvert...

Who am I?
I ask myself.
The first response is - a human being.
Am I truly the real human being?!
Dissect my shield!
Is there any humanity absent?!
Who am I?
I, clearly restless,
not willing to accept the previous
answer, demand a second opinion!
The instant answer is - you always comfort
yourself with the consolatory thought
in your comfort-zone that you’re the best of the best!
The soul retort with a black humor!!
Am I the chosen one or the unrivaled?!
- I ask the soul continually
by holding the scruff of the neck very tightly!
Then why my daily mental demise has
become more effortless
& meaningless than that of ants?!
Why another person of my same species
can play one-sided, betted game of chess
with my shell & mind as pieces?!
Who am I?
I, not even resign
to the diagnosis, ask again!
I am still averse
to accept those answers!!
The third answer
is - like a dual-headed viper,
you are a part-time educator
in the sunrise
& a politician by the essence
for the rest of the sunlight hours!!
Really, am I that horrendous viper
I see in the mirror?!
My soul! You’ve got to be
joking with me!
Why I have become Dr. Discipline
in the morning and Mr. Soul-destroying
–perverted-partisan for the rest
of the hours of daylight?!
The soul answers
in an obeying voice-
you are playing the lead
role in this Dr. Jekyll& Mr. Hyde
play gleefully & willingly,
because you want to salt away
your societal icon
and your sorry, dual-personality expression!
Who am I?
I ask yet again.
The fourth answer is - you have become somewhat
mentally challenged as I make out!
But this same person
had patiently listened & mentally won
war against public up-to-date, inconceivable
evil-doing as a father of a cathedral!”
My soul-searching project has become meaningful
because so many undiscovered dimensions of my soul
have now come into angle!
The soul laughs a roaring laughter!
Then the soul gives me the last answer
with a lot of clues -
if you can dig your own soul so skillfully,
with so much integrity& honesty,
then why bother for the rest?
I am leaving now! I think you must find out
the rest of your poor soul all by yourself!
Huh!! My dear soul! I know who I am!
But I’m soulfully handicapped now as you have left me!!

Rashidul Islam © 2009.
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